Leaving a Church

I have had the opportunity in my life to leave 2 different churches over 3 different situations. I left my first church when I was 19 because of a girl that I eventually married. Then when I was 26 I left that church with my wife and children because we all needed more from the worship gathering. Finally I left the first church (which my family and I had returned to) to become a Pastor at the church I am at now. Except this last church exit, which I grieved over greatly, each of the other 2 exits I did not think to much about after the decision was made. I prayed about the situation, made my decisions, and then moved on. After each leave I did not look back and second guess myself and trusted that God was allowing me to follow where He was leading me and my family.

Over the last month I have watched the first couple leave the church that I now call home. As a Pastor and a little shepherd, this exit does not sit with me well at all. From the perspective of being a Pastor and loving all my sheep the church exit is not a simple pray and move event. I am grieved at the lost, especially since the couple as given up on the church entirely, but overall I second guess myself and what I am doing now from this perspective. This time when the church exit happened I took it personally and it hurt much worse. I did not even know the couple that well but knowing they left and gave up on the church stung badly. So leaving the church in this situation was much different from my perspective now that I was on the other end.

So what do both of these situations mean? I realized now that leaving a church and moving on is not as simple as my mind made it seem years ago. Yes, the church as Jesus see's it is a universal body without walls and all God's children are the same in one. But relationships and loving one another inside those walls is much different. I know now, that as I have over the last month, will fight more and love better for those relationships and not simply let someone slide out and exit the church. As a pastor now the simple idea of leaving a church is huge and not simple. So I know that I must pour out my heart to God for those leaving and unless they are leaving for legitimate reasons I must fight for their soul and desire for them to stay. I now know as a Pastor that I must trust God more than ever for people moving on from the church. Leaving a church is not a simple action and should never be an easy decision.