I have to admit, taking the time to read has been a chore
for me the past several years.
I have a stack of books at home now that I have intended to
read but for one reason or another, I don't make the effort. It's dishonest for
me to tell someone who lends me a book that I'll read it but not get to it. I
apologize for that.
That being said, I'll make another confession. In the past,
I have treated Gods' Word like the Sunday newspaper. I skim through it, look at
the parts that interest me, and then pitch it in the re-cycle bin. The next
Sunday, same routine. Not what you would
expect an elder to say? Would you rather read, something to "make you feel
good", or tickle your ears?
Something insightful, and thought-provoking? I'm not your guy. But God.
The past year has brought many changes in my life. My job
is a roller coaster ride wearing a blindfold sitting backwards in the seat. I
have been neglectful at home and not paid enough attention to Kim (who, by the
way, is a saint). My house would give Bob Vila (TV home improvement guy) the
shivers. But God.
Then I was elected to be an elder. Warts and all. Then this
and that and conflicts, and changes, and ruffled feathers, and blah blah blah. But
God.
I tried writing something insightful, with brevity, perhaps
a small portion of wit and wisdom. In fact, I had started 3 different
commentaries and tossed them. But God.
At times I felt I have wasted a good portion of my life on
ME. At times I felt alone in this life, even with Kim and the boys. At times I had wanted to run out the door down the street
screaming at the top of my lungs. At times I had felt like falling asleep and
not waking up. At times I put on a happy face and pretended. But
God.
I am a sinner, destined one day to spend eternity in
Hell. But God.
You can choose to dismiss this commentary. You can comment
one way or another. You can un-elder me if that is what you want. At this point
in my life, I am in His Hands, and I have God to answer to. I am His child and
choose to devote my life completely to Him. I have nothing but myself to give.
I am not a smart person, not eloquent and apparently not a good teacher. But I
give what I am, and what I have, to God for His Honor and Glory. He has promised
me a place with Him someday, not that I deserve it, or earned it with
"good works", or looked on favorably by others. But by His Grace
through His Sons' Sacrifice.....for me!!
And you too.
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